Thanks to my father, the first 5-syllable word I ever learned was “procrastinator” (in the particular instance he happened to be referring to me.) I like to think I have overcome this seemingly common (yet somewhat deplorable) trait, however, here we are- close to three decades later, and well…
So for all the people out there who often find themselves in a similar predicament, I have compiled a list of all the things you can do to pass the time when you really should be doing something else:
1. Go to see a film at the Tribeca Film Festival. Sneak in, if you have to. There are some good upcoming directors out there that you would be sorry you missed out on. Here’s one I liked.
2. Rotate the clothes in your closet from winter to spring. Take all the winter clothes, put them into boxes. Break out the strappy sandals and confidently transport the wool, velvet and curduroy into the overhead storage above your closet (making sure you have good footing on the step ladder so as not to drop anything and piss off the neighbors below you.)
2. Run a 5k for Breast Cancer. Because, why not. Its for a good cause, raises money and awareness. Besides, who really wants to be sleeping at 7am on a Saturday morning when they could be standing in Times Square, listening to some obscure band playing their rendition of the Beatles’ “With a Little Help from my Friends,” while waiting for the official pink confetti to fall in order to start. If you’re not into running for cancer, there are plenty of other runs/walks and causes that need your help. Do it.
ps. My brother and his GF are doing the NY Aids Walk in a few weeks. If you’d like to do something but just aren’t into walking, you can help them out via the website. There are separate pages for both Jim & Kati.
3. Fill out quizzes from back issues of TONY because, although you had initally intended on exploring the plethora of outdoor events you just know will be coming up in the next few weeks, somewhere along the way you became immediately concerned with the cumulative effects of living in hipsterville Brooklyn and felt compelled to complete multiple “Are you a Hipster?” quizzes to ease your nerves. (PS. According to TONY, I am NOT a hipster.)
4. Surprise visit to the fam! (Especially if they’re a short train ride away and it suddenly occurs to you that sometime- probably long ago- you had left your running shoes at the house and you actually need them for the following morning.) Even if you can’t make up a good excuse, visit anyway.
4.5 FINALLY update your photo site- not because you actually have time but because you can no longer sleep as a result from the incessant pleading from family and friends to hand over their pics.
5. Cook a meal with mom and grandma (because its fun and take-out sucks.) Mix in a few extra ingredients-red pepper is usually good- for a twist. I recommend some broccoli rabe. Make sure to chop up twice the amount of rabe, because it shrinks to half the size. Goes well with apricot chicken. (Still awaiting recipe, Mom…)
6. Spend several hours perusing interior decorating websites, magazines and blogs, trying to decide on a color to paint the kitchen. Reflect on the psychology of color theory you vaguely recall from art school. Debate between several potential candidates and finally pick one you really really like. Then, do nothing. That was tiring enough.
7. Go for a walk around your neighborhood and document all the old signage you love and the new venues that seem to be popping up on a daily basis. Lament over “how it used to be” just a few years back. Voice your concerns to whomever will listen about how you fear all the good Polish food resturants will someday be taken over my some Chinese foot massage joint or yet another unique boutique shop selling sustainable clothing.
8. Reverse the seasonal closet transformation you put into effect only days prior because, apparently, winter is not yet over and you realize you cannot get by with just a cardigan at night.
9. Add more friends to Facebook. Explore their apps. Add them to your own profile. Send test messages to Twitter. Check for them on Facebook. Rearrange the apps in your profile. Rinse and repeat.
10. Reorganize your bookshelf; first according to size, then topic, then come to the conclusion that they actually looked better in the original cluster of random placement and try desperately to remember what that was. When completely frustrated with futile attempts to reconstruct the previous configuration, scrap the idea and begin adding books to goodread’s facebook app.
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